Palais Royale: 9
Dirty Pirate Hookers: 14
The Dirty Pirate Hookers' plunderous romp through the 2007 fall season culminated Wednesday night when they ransacked the surging Palais Royale in a 14–9 conquest. Multiple postponements, the absence of key players, and frigid temperatures could not sink this Pirate armada. The Hookers darted from their positions and poured from the dugout to form a celebratory throng in the middle of the infield when Joe G’s weak pop up reached its apex before settling into the glove of closer Ben Ho. "That’s exactly what I wanted—every pitcher wants to catch the last out of the season...I was dealing..." said an animated Ben Ho.
Once again, the Pirate’s besieged their opponent and never lost control of the game. The tone was set in quick fashion when little used starter John C flipped his first two seam strike by Mike W to the capable glove of his battery mate, Keri Z. As in his only regular season start, John C was daunting—posting goose eggs in the first two innings and giving up only 5 hits and 4 runs in 4 innings of work against a powerful Royale’s offense that suffered a completely different fate after dropping 22 runs on Blitzkrieg in the AL Finals. "The two seamer was moving nice—breaking about 8" to 12"...diving in on their righties’ hands...the knuckler was good early, but fell victim to the cold in the 4th...the cutter was useless—the ball didn’t have enough tack..." mused John C.
His pitches were frequently mishit by the Royale’s leading to expletive laced cries of exasperation. "Yeah, that was pretty good...I threw only one real bad pitch—to their lefty; Tom N—it was their only hard hit (off of John C). They had a few plinkers fall in front of the OF, but that’s the game..." The strike zone shrunk a bit in the 3rd leading to a couple hits and a walk by the Royale’s. "I can’t say that...I thought they were just missing...but Pak’s decent back there...I was just a little off; it’s my job to pick it up" said John C refusing to be drawn into a petty debate.
Leading off the Royale’s 3rd, Scot O banged a double past Deryl B at third. Tom N followed up with a hard double to right scoring Scot O for their first run. After a pop up by Mike W and a walk issued to Sarah W, Tom N scored on a sac fly to left–center by Chris M. John C finished off the Royale’s 3rd by coercing Ali M to a left–center fly out. John C neutralized the Royale’s biggest advantage: their Div 1 females Sarah W and Ali M. "I just wanted to make quick work of them; I gave them what they wanted—and took advantage of my outfield..." The strategy worked leading to 3 outs and 1 walk in 4 plate appearances by the softball bruising women forcing Ali M to moan "what the hell was that...you with that spinning crap and him...that stupid knuckler (referring to closer Ben Ho)?"
The Royale’s 4th commenced with a couple well placed singles through the infield. Joe G hit into a 5–4 fielder’s choice eliminating Bryan M at third; Lisa W advanced to third on an attempted double play; and Joe G advanced to second on a throwing error by Deryl. Liz L pushed home Lisa W on a 4–3 sac and Scot O drove in a run before Tom N flew out to left ending the inning.
The marvelous Matt "Rookie" T quickly ignited the Hookers’ offense in the bottom of the 1st when he punched a ground ball by Sarah W at third; Matt T alertly advanced to second on a missed throw to the infield. Erika moved Matt to third on a line drive single. An error in right allowed Ben Ho to reach base and Matt T to score. Erika smartly advanced to third on the misplay and was driven in by Christina’s line drive single up the middle.
The Hookers were quiet in the 2nd posting two singles, but scoring none. Ben Ho led off the 3rd with a hard double to left before advancing to third on a fielder’s choice grounder by Christina that resulted in no outs. Christina hit a slow bouncer to Ali M at first; the ball was deftly scooped up by the first baseman, but instead of taking the sure out at first, she attempted a big play on the plodding Ben Ho. Both runners were safe after a wide and ill advised throw to third. Ben Ho scored the Pirate’s third run on a sac fly by Mark M. A double by Brett B went for naught when Jessica smacked a hard line drive toward Mike W at short whose quick reflexes truncated the Hookers’ 3rd.
The Pirate’s seemed on the verge of a big offensive inning from the start, but sputtered along until the 4th when they finally exploited their effort. Deryl B—in the midst of a perfect night and perfect post season at the plate—led off the 4th with a single through the 5–6 hole. John C followed up with a blistering line drive that careened off the pitcher before being picked up—too late—in front of short. "He nearly put that through him..." stressed Ali M illustrating the ferocity of the hit. After a moment of concern, Joe G stomped to the mound and continued to pitch. Matt T collected another hit that propelled Deryl across the plate. Erika walked and Ben Ho followed with a sac fly scoring Mark M (running for John C). Christina punched another single over the right side of the infield driving in Matt T. Mark M crushed a double to left that hit mid way up the fence easily scoring Christina. Brett B, with another mammoth offensive effort, put the exclamation point on the Pirate’s colossal 7 run inning by launching a 3 run bomb to left over Scot O who climbed the fence in a bleak attempt at salvation.
Sticking with his game plan, John C sent the Pirate’s ace closer, Ben Ho, to the mound in the 5th. "I like being used this way—it makes me more effective..." said Ben Ho referring to his use as the team’s hammer closer. "...He’s got a devastating knuckler, works quick, and throws strikes; what’s not to like?" emphasized John C while adding "sometimes he’s too much on the plate and needs to waste a pitch or two..." The Royale’s quickly put a runner on with a weak line drive falling behind first base. After advancing to second on a 5–4 fielder’s choice, Mike W scored on a HR by Chris M that floated through the cold air and just over the fence in left–center field. Ben Ho gave up another single before Deryl snared a hard line drive at third. Lisa W ended the Royale’s 5th hitting into a 5–3 force—a look of frustration crossed her face when she passed Mike F at first.
The Pirate’s reciprocated in their half of the 5th by scoring two runs. A lead off single by Deryl followed by a double from Matt T put two runners on for the steady Erika S. With the count 2-1, Erika fought off a nasty inside pitch that landed just fair in right-field and earned 2 RBI for the effort. The end of the 5th had the Hookers pressuring the Royale’s with a sizable 12-6 lead.
The Royale’s threatened a big inning in the 6th by changing their approach and attacking the middle of the field. After the Royale’s made a quick out, Liz L slashed a single past second. Three consecutive doubles by Scot O, Pierre A, and Mike W led to 3 runs and cut the Pirate’s lead to 3; 12–9. Ben Ho settled down and worked two weak pop ups to end the Royale’s threat.
The Hookers’ response was swift as they took advantage of the Royale’s defensive insipidness instigated by the desperate realization of dwindling offensive opportunity. Mark M reached base on a tough E–10 by launching a pop up into low orbit. When the ball finally glanced off the rover’s glove, Mark M was standing at second. As Jo Ho popped to third, Brett B’s ominous presence loomed on deck. Brett capped an astounding night at the plate by launching a 2 run canon shot deeply over the left–field fence concluding the Hookers’ offensive assault. There were no prayers this time by the Royale’s left fielder, only a sense of foreboding.
Invigorated, Ben Ho strode to the mound craving to put the Royale’s to rest. In his best inning of work, Ben Ho inundated the Royale’s allowing only a weak double. Joe G frantically tried to prolong the Royale’s season fouling off several pitches, but had to settle for the role of a footnote in the plundering history of the Dirty Pirate Hookers’ perfect season.
With that, Deryl B instilled some age earned wisdom: "We were the underdogs...we were perfect. Everybody wanted us to lose...everybody stacked up and played their best against us. We were in the toughest division—played the toughest teams...we beat the odds...we beat them all..."
| Player | PA | AB | H | W | K | SF | S | 1B | 2B | 3B | HR | TB | XB | R | RBI | Avg | OBP | Slg | Iso |
| Christina | 4 | 4 | 2 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 2 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 2 | 0 | 1 | 2 | 0.615 | 0.571 | 0.615 | 0.000 |
| Erika G | 4 | 3 | 2 | 1 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 2 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 2 | 0 | 2 | 2 | 0.556 | 0.600 | 0.556 | 0.000 |
| Jessica G | 4 | 4 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.286 | 0.375 | 0.286 | 0.000 |
| Jo Ho | 1 | 1 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.333 | 0.300 | 0.667 | 0.333 |
| Tracy Z | -- | -- | -- | -- | -- | -- | -- | -- | -- | -- | -- | -- | -- | -- | -- | 0.100 | 0.100 | 0.100 | 0.000 |
| Keri Z | 3 | 3 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 1 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.000 | 0.000 | 0.000 | 0.000 |
| Ben Ho | 4 | 3 | 2 | 0 | 0 | 1 | 0 | 1 | 1 | 0 | 0 | 3 | 1 | 1 | 1 | 0.700 | 0.667 | 1.700 | 1.000 |
| Brett B | 4 | 4 | 3 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 1 | 0 | 2 | 10 | 7 | 2 | 5 | 0.545 | 0.545 | 1.727 | 1.182 |
| Deryl B | 4 | 4 | 4 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 4 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 4 | 0 | 2 | 0 | 1.000 | 1.000 | 1.143 | 0.143 |
| John C | 2 | 2 | 1 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 1 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 1 | 0 | 1 | 0 | 0.500 | 0.500 | 0.750 | 0.250 |
| Mark E | -- | -- | -- | -- | -- | -- | -- | -- | -- | -- | -- | -- | -- | -- | -- | 0.571 | 0.571 | 1.000 | 0.429 |
| Mark M | 4 | 3 | 1 | 0 | 0 | 1 | 0 | 0 | 1 | 0 | 0 | 2 | 1 | 2 | 2 | 0.769 | 0.667 | 1.846 | 1.077 |
| Matt T | 5 | 5 | 4 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 3 | 1 | 0 | 0 | 5 | 1 | 3 | 1 | 0.824 | 0.824 | 1.941 | 1.118 |
| Mike F | 2 | 2 | 0 | 0 | 1 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0.500 | 0.571 | 1.000 | 0.500 |
| Todd S | -- | -- | -- | -- | -- | -- | -- | -- | -- | -- | -- | -- | -- | -- | -- | 0.700 | 0.727 | 1.300 | 0.600 |
| Totals: | 41 | 38 | 19 | 1 | 1 | 2 | 0 | 14 | 4 | 0 | 2 | 29 | 10 | 14 | 13 | 0.500 | 0.488 | 0.763 | 0.263 |
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| Boxscore | 1 | 2 | 3 | 4 | 5 | 6 | 7 |
| R | H | E |
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| Palais Royale | 0 | 0 | 2 | 2 | 2 | 3 | 0 |
| 9 | 14 | 4 |
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| DPH | 2 | 0 | 1 | 7 | 2 | 2 | X |
| 14 | 19 | 2 |
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| Pitchers | IP | R | ER | H | K | BB |
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| John C | 4 | 4 | 4 | 5 | 0 | 1 |
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| Ben Ho | 3 | 5 | 5 | 9 | 1 | 0 |
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